 |
of You Tick. The Key Is In the Brain Filters Used.
|
As explained in another article, in order to prevent sensory overload, the brain filters every experience,
deleting and distorting in the process.
What gets stored does not represent what actually happened but only your perception of what really happened. How do those filters actually work? Here is a great analytical tool that is easy to use. It will enable you, offline after you get sufficient input, to find out just what makes you and the person you have communicated with tick. The tool is known as Metaprograms. It explains why certain things get noticed by a person and why others are overlooked. More specifically, it indicates how and why certain information is deleted, on a deep subconscious level, to form habitual patterns of thinking, decision making, and behavior. Once the metaprograms are known and compensated for, you will be able to improve the quality of your relationship. And you will have a handle on how you each think and decide and act. Your ability to sell ideas and yourself to the other will be vastly improved. Sound almost too good to be true? Well, listen up. Each of the following descriptions tells how the specific filter applicable to an individual works. Most of the metaprograms come in pairs, with each part usually the opposite of the other.This is not a true or false situation. There is no right or wrong. But if you want to make hay while the other's filter shines, you had better adapt to his or her way of thinking or acting with respect to that type of information. Keep in mind that there are shades. It is rarely a black and white situation. You are looking for the dominant tendency. Remember that neither side of a metaprogram is good or bad, but just reflects the style of the individual. 1. PRO-ACTIVE OR REACTIVE. This particular program is all about action. People with Pro-Active Metaprograms initiate action. They make the first move. They play offense. They are interested in end results. They delete caution and risk signs and propel themselves into a forward stance. Since it is difficult for them to just react, you must try to get them to to act. One way is with words that tell them to go to it, to do it, or that it is time to act. Those with Reactive Metaprograms wait until the other makes a move, then react to it. They take a long time to decide or do not decide at all. They play defense. It is difficult for them to grab the ball and run unless someone else initiates the play.They are fire fighters, frequently content to wait until they spot smoke or flames. They hold back until confronted with signs that the game has begun. You can easily reach an impasse if you expect them to start. So go with their flow. Make them understand that it is all right to deliberate. Tell them to wait or to analyze the matter further or to think about it. 2. TOWARD OR AWAY. This particular program is all about motivation. People with Toward Metaprograms stay focused on goals. They go for what they want. They stretch for that ring every time they glide past, as if they were on a carousel horse. The carrot approach works best with them. They are energized by pleasure and motivated by reward.
Those with Away Metaprograms look for and try to avoid problems. They are clear about what they do not want. The stick approach works best with them. They want to avoid loss, pain or punishment. 3. INTERNAL OR EXTERNAL. This particular program is all about reenforcement. It deals with the sources of feedback relied upon to fuel effort or movement. People with Internal Metaprograms use their own internal standards to make comparisons and decisions. Ask them how they know they have done well and the answer will frequently be that they just know it, inside. They resent someone else making decisions for them, even if the the decisions are good ones. Those with External Metaprograms need others to supply standards and directions. Someone has to tell them a job is well done. They will ask for your opinion and advice. They like being managed and supervised. 4. OPTIONS OR PROCEDURES. This particular Metaprogram is all about the manner in which tasks are approached. People with Option Metaprograms want choices and alternatives. They frequently are reluctant to blindly follow the tried and true path. They want to know the “why” of doing something. Those with Procedure Metaprograms are good at following a set course of action that has been laid down by others. They are not good at developing procedures. They want to know the how of things. 5. GENERAL OR SPECIFIC. This Metaprogram is all about how much a person wants to bite off and chew. What size or segment of information does a person prefer to deal with? People with General Metaprograms like to look at the big picture. In order to do so, they subconsciously delete most of the fine details. They think best when assessing large chunks of information. Those with Specific Metaprograms pay attention to details. They think in logical order. They build their understanding by starting with the small and then working up to the large. 6. MATCH OR MISMATCH. This Metaprogram is all about how people make comparisons. People with Match Metaprograms look for similarities in making com- parisons. Those with Mismatch Metaprograms notice differences or discrepancies when making comparisons. Many people have a Combination Style with respect to this Metaprogram. Some look for similarities first and then for differences, while others approach it in opposite fashion. 7. CONVINCER PATTERNS. This Metaprogram is all about how a person becomes convinced. A visual person needs to see examples. An auditory person needs to talk to people and gather information. A feeling or kinesthetic person has to actually try out things. How a person manages information is another aspect of this metaprogram. Some want a number of examples before they make up their mind. Others exhibit an automatic pattern, where they jump to conclusions on the basis of little or no information. Still others evidence a consistency pattern, requiring proof over and over again. 8. SORTING PATTERNS. This particular Metaprogram is all about how people sort and remember information. Some people sort and remember primarily things. Others sort and remember by places. Still others by people or by time or by type of activity. All of this may seem very complicated when you first read about it, but if you take the time to learn and use the tool, it will help you for the rest of your life. Although not too well publicized, you have one of the most powerful tools to understand yourself and others you will ever come across. Keep in mind that these metaprograms do not and should not constitute a checklist used on the playing field. Rather,they are to be used after encounters, whether by email or phone or in person, so that you will be able to understand the other and yourself and subsequently interact and bond more effectively. Go through the list and discover your metaprograms, then do the same with respect to the other. During subsequent conversations or meetings, try to dwell on their metaprogram turf. You will be pleasantly surprised at how easy both of you get along as a result. For a detailed explanation of this and other breakthrough techniques that can help you and your significant other bond more effectively, go to Improve Any Relationship About The Author: Home Page | Improve Any Relationship | Personal Improvement | Revive Being Alive | Relationship Manual | Core Lore Manual | |